Shut Up Aunty !

By Tuesday, November 06, 2012

It's been a crazy weekend, I finally got home and there was a big family reunion. It's always great to meet old relatives -cousins and 'aunties' , although I am really not sure about the aunties part.
I hate being questioned by these aunties especially when you can't figure out how they are related to you. It's like they come out of no where and start attacking before you can find a way to escape


Aunty : Beta pehchana
In my mind :No I don't know who the hell are you so I am just going to pretend I know you and try to slide out of the conversations
What I say : Ofcourse aunty, how can I not remember YOU. Mom talks about you all the time


Aunty : You look exactly like your mother
In my mind :Yes, surprisingly she is my real mother. I doubt it sometimes but well, what can we do about it ?
What I say : Really? Thanks a lot aunty, if only I could be half as good as her


Aunty :You have all grown up since the last time I saw you.
In my mind :Did you really think I was a dwarf or had a curious case of Benjamin Button ? Also ,when was the last time you saw me ? Have we really met before ?
What I say : Oh yes I absolutely remember the last time we met.You should come visit more often. Everyone talks about you at home, all the time


Aunty : Which class are you in ?
In my mind : I am not in school anymore, get over it *beep beep*. Your stupid kid is in school
What I say : I passed out of school 3 years ago, which class is your son in ?


Aunty : You know our son was first in his class and got 95%
In my mind : And you really think I care ? What's his name again ?
What I say : That is remarkable, I always knew he was a great at studies. He's always so passionate about everything

Aunty :You should really start eating properly, you are getting so thin
In my mind :I am not 'getting' thin, I was always thin. May be you should ask your son to control his diet because I can see four tyres right through his tshirt
What I say :  *Nothing * Just smile, trying my best to hide my frustrations




Hope you had a better weekend
Ritika


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57 comments

  1. hahahahahahaha --- at that 'grown up' point -- i'm like "Aunty aur koi option bhi toh nahi tha" .... :D

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  2. Universal Aunty conversation... this can fit in all the conversation I had wid random aunties. :)

    Supa like it.

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    Replies
    1. I agree with the 'random' aunty part. You never know who they actually are

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  3. hahaha.......Typical Indian aunti g :-)

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  4. Hehehe...Had a good laugh :D

    Regards
    Village Girl

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  5. sigh.. I wish I HAD these kind of aunties... believe me. The ones I have indulge ( i kid u not ) in black magic , destroying their own kids weddings cos they dont like the brides THEY themselves chose etc.. compared to that, these kinda aunties are just sweety pies to me :)

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    Replies
    1. They really sound like sweet pies compared to yours :/
      Although mine can give you a serious mental torture

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  6. Typical Aunty talk :) but you managed it really well. I am an utter failure when it comes to small talk, I cover it up with a smile. So am well known among relatives & in-laws as a "girl who hardly talks but smiles a lot"

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    Replies
    1. I have SO many relatives, a small get together consists of atleast 50 people. So, I have kinda self trained myself. I am known as the sweet soft-spoken girl :P

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  7. Hahahahaha...... Nice one.....

    http://debnature.blogspot.in

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  8. hahahahahha... OMG... Earlier all the aunts wanted me to get married, now when I got married, they wannt me to have baby.... i mean, comeon, live your own life..

    Himanshu Nagpal | Being Traveler

    http://www.beingtraveler.com

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    Replies
    1. Live their own lives without interfering in ours...yeah, that's never going to happen :p

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  9. Lolz!..Very funny!...I don't hate all aunties, coz some of them are wellwishers. But really hate the ones who poke their noses in everything and gossip here and there!

    Nice entertaining post!

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    Replies
    1. They are all good hearted. But their annoying questions makes me want to run for my life :/

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  10. Good one! I liked the presentation. You should do more of 'in my mind' topics.

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  11. Hahahaha! :D Good one... Aunties at all places are just the same!! same to same :D

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    Replies
    1. May be they have a secret International Aunties Committee which comes up with more and more poke-y questions every year :P

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  12. Well, so is the case with the guys..we are equally pissed by these bothering aunties..:(

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  13. Entertaining view from the other end-anyone here who LIKES aunties ?

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    Replies
    1. I have serious doubts about that :P

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    2. Honest reply.But consider this-your mom will be an aunty to some.No offense meant-only joking----SMILE.

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  14. ha ha :D if only auntie could hear what were you saying in mind :)

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    Replies
    1. I dont know about the aunty but my mom would have killed me :P

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  15. I was just thinking : What an uproarious situation it would be if WHAT I SAID is replaced by IN MY MIND :-)

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    Replies
    1. Please read the above lines Haddock, my mother spares no one :P

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  16. Have gone through a lot of such torture! And now I am in the so called phase of "age to get married" so you can imagine! :D BTW loved the blog :)

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    Replies
    1. Oh then than aunties must be throwing questions at the speed of light :P

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  17. hmmmmmmmmmmmmm ok tell me now that you think of the conversation dont you smile :) he he he he ..

    Aunty's well what can we say they are ever so thoughtful ..


    Bikram's

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  18. I think i have met this aunty :)

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  19. ROFL!!! Cant stop laughing when i read this one
    "Did you really think I was a dwarf or had a curious case of Benjamin Button ?" Hilarious ...
    Thanks for gifting this funny time Ritika. . Wish you meet this aunty so often so that we will get a chance to red more posts like this!!:~)

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    Replies
    1. Don't even wish that Renju, there are high chances I might be dead :P

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    2. Oops!! Are they that much dangerous??;-) The max they can give u is an evening full of headache!! :~)

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  20. hehehe.... I like the curious case of benjamin button wala part....

    This s smthng u cud only see in India.. Curious case f aunties.. :) :)

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  21. My teenage cousin once asked why do aunties say 'beta inti badi ho gayi ho. Do they want me to stay small??' We just rolled on the floor listening to her quirky remarks!
    Sometimes when we need to make conversation we say the obvious and its funny. Lets just hope that when we grow older we remember these things and dont make a fool of ourselves!

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  22. Hahaha. And then there are uncles too :-)

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  23. Its good to know that it's like they come out of no where and start attacking before you can find a way to escape. Use Justdial Pune for local search.

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  24. Hilarious dialogues ....and that's what we end up saying ;)

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  25. Short but hilarious one Ritika :-D

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