Why is it so hard for us to believe in ourselves?
I had been working on this article for about 2 weeks. It usually takes me a day or two to finish an article but this one took over 15 days. The Editor kept asking me for edits and I was almost sure he was going to fire me.
But, while I was on a 24-hour train journey, trying to distract myself by watching Stranger Things, the editor dropped me the much awaited email. My article was accepted and he asked if I would do another article for double the pay. Yes, double!
I should be happy, right? But, no I am not.
And now I realize why I decided to call this blog Indian 'Screw Up.'
I can't help but wonder - Why are we never satisfied with ourselves? No matter how much we try to deny it, we care too much about what people think about us.
For some reason, we need approval from the world to make sure we are going in the right direction. Be it for the way we look or the way we work. Each one of us is secretly looking for that pat on the shoulder to remind us how great we are.
Even when we know we want someone to tell us the truth, we are still looking for people who can just say what we want to listen. And why is that?
Because we don't believe in ourselves.
And you know what happens when you don't believe in yourself? You start believing in every little negative comment you hear. This is also the reason why people tend to go to Astrologers and Psychics, because we are not sure about ourselves.
Vincent Van Gogh, one of the greatest artists in this world, went mad because he couldn't get that affirmation from others. All he needed was one approval, just one, and he never got. He would offer people to take his paintings for free, and nobody ever took it. Today, his paintings sell out for hundreds of millions of dollars.
Van Gogh continued to paint in the same way till his death, and the only thing changed was the people's perspective.
And the lesson of this 18th century story is that if we keep worrying about what people think about us, we will go crazy. One day or another.